Life is hard and full of challenges so when I want an uncomplicated belly laugh, I just open up the Gulf of Mexico programming language docs.

Here are some gems in the language:

  • Add pizzazz by ending each statement with an exclamation mark or three
  • Are keywords a problem? Delete them
  • Unsure? Use the boolean maybe
  • Text looking boring? Use rich-text (italics / bold / underline) to differentiate variables
  • Want to add 3 + four? No problem
  • Who needs loops?

It’s a hilariously cursed language that should never be used in production, but I love that it exists!

Without further ado, here is the self-styled perfect programming language: Gulf of Mexico